Note from Elaine Difficult Decisions...

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Feature Article 'The POWER of DECISION'

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January 27, 2011
Volume 2, Issue 4


Published every Thursday.


Hello again,

I had to make a BIG decision this week regarding the kitty in the photo.

This is a picture of Charlie, my ginger tomcat, who’s 19 years old in April.

Over the last week he’s been in a lot of pain and the vet confirmed that he had three bad teeth that needed to be extracted. Thursday he stopped eating.

He needed an operation quickly.

On the phone my vet gave me the bad news: Giving an old cat anaesthetic is very high risk because they could lose him while operating. He’s also diabetic and has mild kidney problems.

He had a few things stacked up against him. I had to decide between:

  1. Operate (the best option).

  2. Don’t operate and continue with pain killers, masking the issue, and hope maybe the teeth would fall out.

My vet provisionally booked the operation.

The voices in my head started to create the ‘what if…’ scenarios. I doubted my judgement as I wavered between these two options. I didn’t want to make the WRONG decision.

I phoned back to ask a few questions. Then I got CLEAR. I decided to let Charlie have the operation. This would provide a better outcome for him moving forward if he could just make it through the operation (this bit was up to Charlie to decide!).

As I left him at the vet last Friday, I remained clear in my decision. Yes, it was a difficult few hours as I waited for news.

He made it through fine – one tough ginger tom!

I brought him home on Friday evening and slept downstairs to check on him through the night. He purred ALL night! (I did too!)

The photo was taken last Saturday as he was snoring in his favourite bed. One contented kitty!

This experience reminded me about the POWER of Decision. Making decisions is not always easy because we doubt our abilities and become indecisive. Fear feeds upon itself and suffocates us from the inside-out.

Scroll down to read more…

Oh… and Charlie asked me to remind you to,

Work Brilliant!

Have a purr-fect week!




"she... helps you change what you need to change to move forward, to succeed, to achieve your goals."

I have worked with Elaine during most of 2010 with absolutely great results. Elaine is very enjoyable to work with, very personable, understanding, and genuinely cares about people. She listens well, understands situations, and applies her knowledge and experience to help you change what you need to change to move forward, to succeed, to achieve your goals. She's an awesome coach and trainer and I consider myself lucky to have her in my corner. You will too! :-)

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The POWER of DECISION

“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you're not going to stay where you are.”

~ John Pierpont Morgan

Decisions are at the heart of success. Successful people make decisions quickly.

So why is it difficult for some people to make a decision?

Most people are scared of making the wrong decision. So instead, they avoid the decision-making process altogether in the hope that someone else will make the decision for them, or that the issue will go away (see last week’s ezine for “9 Common Excuses for Indecision.”).

I experienced this first hand many years ago when I was in an unhealthy relationship. Instead of facing the situation and ending the relationship, I avoided it, settled, and survived. I got busy instead, travelling for business and other activities to take me away from the unhappiness at home. I deluded myself by saying "perhaps it wasn’t THAT bad after all?".

My indecision made things worse.

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face."

~Eleanor Roosevelt

Deep down I realised the power of my own decision. I was hiding from my power by using the excuse that I was scared. Instead of using my power, I took no accountability or responsibility for the situation and stayed in a state of indecision for well over a year.

The difficulty of life is in the choice:

Do I?

Don’t I?

Either way YOU ALWAYS have the POWER to decide.

…Just decide!

Any decision usually involves three steps:

  1. Recognition of a need (Get Clear)
  2. Decision to change (Conscious Choice)
  3. Conscious commitment to implement the decision (100% Commitment).

Whether this is to de-clutter your bedroom, begin exercising at the gym, give your old clothes to charity.

Or...

Leave your job, move to a new location, or end an unhealthy relationship.

These are all decisions.

Sometimes you have to let go of things to make room for others. This is how we grow.

Making small decisions regularly will help you to build confidence in your ability. You’ll begin to learn to trust yourself and make decisions more quickly.

A few words about Doubt…

“Doubt means don’t.”

~Oprah Winfrey

Doubts can be scary -- they make us miss opportunities because we’re too frightened to make a decision. We become indecisive and this is debilitating. Fear feeds upon itself and suffocates us from the inside-out.

It’s important not to make any serious decisions because you’re desperate, frightened, angry, upset, or exhausted. These decisions will NOT be made rationally and you may regret them later.

Here’s how to work through doubt:

  1. Buy some time if you feel stuck because you don’t know what to do next. Create some space for yourself. Now is NOT the time to decide.

  2. "Don’t" – doesn’t mean NEVER – Oprah’s quotation doesn’t mean NEVER. It means don’t rush into something under pressure in-the-moment because you’ll not be able to make clear decision.

  3. Take Time Out – Have a break from thinking about the situation. Allow a day off to rest and look after yourself. Bide your time. Take the pressure off and stop trying so hard to do too much too fast. Your clarity will begin to flow again after a short break. (This is different from avoidance!)

  4. Get Clear – Make a decision for the right reasons and when you are calm, grounded and thoughtful. Re-align to your WHY. Re-decide whether making any decision is necessary or desirable. Think it through before acting, so that you will not end up creating unnecessary problems.

If you are surrounded by loads of possibilities and don’t know which one to choose, just choose one – any one of them!

…And enjoy the journey as you move towards something.

You can’t steer if you’re not moving – so start moving in a direction and the steering will become much easier! You ALWAYS have the POWER to choose your direction.

One of my coaches taught me that if something feels right then you’ll feel warmer both physically and emotionally. So go where you feel the warmest and begin there. If it’s not right you’ll feel differently and receive signals to change. Trust your instincts. Observe your feelings associated with your decision. Listen to yourself from the inside-out.

It’s never too late to change direction. You can always change your mind later. You can’t fail to learn from the journey. There is NO wrong answer.

The important thing is that you chose to move forward.

YOU ALWAYS have the POWER to decide.


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Elaine Bailey is devoted to coaching successful women and men into their best lives. She mentors busy people to move away from the chaos and overwhelm of settling and surviving by offering them a whole new approach to productivity, business and lifestyle. Her weekly eZine WorkBrilliant™ goes out every Thursday and is full of practical tips and techniques to move from misery to mastery EVERY single day! You can sign up for a F.R.E.E. subscription to WorkBrilliant™ at www.elainebaileyinternational.com.

 

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Elaine is the president and founder of Elaine Bailey International Ltd, a company solely devoted to coaching successful women and men into their best lives. She mentors busy corporate people to move away from the chaos and overwhelm of settling and surviving by offering them a whole new approach to productivity, business and lifestyle. Her clients range from nurses, vets, lawyers, bankers, entrepreneurs, senior executives to creatives, who are ready to take the leading role in their life.

Through her workshops, courses, coaching programmes, and products, Elaine shows her clients how to experience freedom and how to take the control back in a busy life. She shares an inside and out approach to create ultimate abundance and happiness.

Elaine is also an international business coach and Head of Coaching for a highly respected learning and development consultancy business in the UK. She works at senior level in large organisations. She is also an international motivational speaker, whose topics include “Are You in Business or Busy-ness? Four Ways to Get Your Life Back on Purpose.”


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