~ John C Maxwell
Not believing in yourself is one of the main reasons that holds people back from being successful.
Most people struggle to recognize and articulate their own value. They feel uncomfortable communicating and creating leverage with others. (Such as a potential client or your boss.)
To be successful you need to recognize that you have value and continually add value to yourself by investing time and effort into you. This isn’t about being arrogant or egotistical – it’s about knowing your strengths and seeing the possibilities.
Here’s the thing…
So many people stop growing and fail to reach their potential because they don’t believe in themselves.
It’s a self-esteem issue.
If you don’t know your own self worth, you limit your potential because you’re not able to recognize the possibilities that are available to you.
As Zig Ziglar once said:
“It’s impossible to consistently behave in a manner inconsistent with how we see ourselves. We do very few things in a positive way if we feel negative about ourselves.”
How do you see yourself? Are you worthy?
- If you don’t believe that you have any value what you’re saying is that you’re not worth investing in.
- If you believe you are worthless, then you’re not going to put the time or effort in or look for opportunities to add value to yourself. You unconsciously relegate YOU to the bottom of the list.
Our own self-image is often a reflection of the value that others project on to us. Most of us set our expectations based on other people’s opinions or beliefs of us. This is okay if we have supportive and encouraging people around us. If not, then you’ll start listening to the negative influences of others. You stop believing in yourself and listen to the voices of others instead.
Here’s what the naysayers might be saying around you:
- ‘You’ll never account for much!’
- ‘You’ll not get anywhere with running a business’
- ‘No one in our family has ever amounted to much!’
- ‘You’ll fail in six months and wish you’d kept your old job!’
- ‘It’s not going to happen so don’t waste your time.’
These statements are not true…
I believe your potential is unlimited. Explore and cultivate the possibilities of what could be.
Here’s how to start:
1. Stop worrying about what other people think of you – It’s what YOU think of YOU that matters! I’ve coached many people who have been living their lives according to what other people believe about them. My family was skeptical that I’d run my own business. Do it anyway! Create your own solution. You get to choose who you become – Not other people!
2. Listen to your language – You are what you think through the constant conversations that you have in your head. Are these positive or negative? Change the way you think of yourself by improving the quality of your inner dialogue. Stop being your worst critic and become your coach instead. Have positive conversations rather than negative ones. Tune in to how you talk to yourself.
3. List your strengths – Get to know yourself. Increase your self-awareness by understanding what you’re good at:
- What feedback do you get from others about what you are good at?
- What are your strengths (Strengths Finder 2.0 is a great starting point)?
- What are your talents and skills?
- What are you doing when you’re helping other people?
- What do you enjoy doing?
4. STOP comparing yourself to others – Being successful is about your relationship with YOU. Comparing is an unnecessary distraction that takes your attention away from your intention and is harmful to your self-esteem. It’s all perception and it will either discourage you or feed your ego! None of which serves you or help you grow. Stay in your business of YOU. What do you need in order to grow today?
5. Identify and reframe your limiting beliefs – Most limiting beliefs are self-Imposed. Reframing enables us to find new and different ways of thinking about a situation to open up new possibilities that were previously closed off. Reframing can transform our understanding of a situation and lead to new thinking, feeling, action and better outcomes.
Here are some questions to help you to reframe a limiting belief:
- What are you thinking that’s getting in the way of your success right now?
- How does this make you feel?
- How do you want to think, feel and act instead?
- Write a turnaround statement for yourself.
- Give yourself permission to think, feel and act in this new way.
- Practice it daily so it becomes a habit
5. Look for opportunities to demonstrate your value to others – Share your gifts with others. Be in service to others by helping them with your expertise and experience. Let them know how you can help them. You might have information to share that saves someone time and helps them become more effective. Look for opportunities to reach out. This will create positive experiences.
Take a small step each day to uncovering and sharing your value – Forward motion.
You ARE WORTH IT!