Stop Resisting!

By , June 11, 2011 3:08 pm

“Just trust that everything is unfolding the way it is supposed to. Don’t resist. Surrender to what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be.”

Sonia Ricotti – Author.

“I’ve got so much work to do I can’t see the end of it. I’m always going to be working late. I’ll never have any time for me or my relationships. I’m in a big black hole. My life really sucks!”

George, a coaching client.

Do you ever feel like things are not turning out the way they’re supposed to?

Sometimes we set off in the direction of our goal, we try something and it doesn’t work out the way we intended it.

You may not get the result you thought you wanted: 1st prize in the competition.  Your VISA card is up to it’s limit. You didn’t find the man of your dreams on match.com or only two people signed up for your workshop.

Whatever the situation, it’s easy to become reactive and resistant. You get locked into negative thoughts such as: ‘I’m just not cut out for this…’ or ‘I knew I wouldn’t win anyway!’ or ‘It shouldn’t be this way…’

It’s easy to become the victim. Complaining, resisting, getting upset or judging just prolongs the pain of the situation and it doesn’t help you to change anything. Instead you’ll continue to resist the reality of it.

Resisting takes a lot of energy and effort to maintain (I know this personally!).

The important thing here is to keep moving in the direction of your goal, no matter what the Universe presents to you! Your intended result may not always happen and this is perfectly okay. Rather than cling onto the pain or discomfort, let it go so that you can move onto something better.

You can’t fail to learn…

When one door closes, I always find that another door opens and it’s usually to a bigger and better place.

Here are some ways to move forward:

1. Stop resisting what is – Stop resisting what’s going on in your life just now, and choose to accept the current situation and the facts. E.g. I didn’t win 1st Prize. I currently have a heavy workload. Just accepting the situation can release the pressure and make you feel better. Don’t associate any meaning or emotions to it (This is not about giving up by the way!). This is all about accepting what is.

2. Get Clear on what you want – Re-align to your goal. Get clear and re-decide on what you really want. Remember WHY it is important to you and re-commit your attention and energy.

3. The Source of your power is YOU – Take responsibility for the current situation – It’s okay. Learn to listen and pay attention to your instincts – don’t ignore them. (You know – That little intuitive voice deep inside but you often ignore?!) You already have the solution inside of you. It is drowned out by all the resistance and noise. Choose to step into your power and listen to your inner wisdom. Create a plan to follow.

4. Take Action – Choose one small thing and do it. Start with the first logical step, then take another one, then another. Lean in and create some momentum every day.

5. Get support – You can’t do everything alone. Sometimes it helps to have a sounding board, someone who isn’t close to the situation who can offer support. A coach can support you in many ways. Asking for help is perfectly okay and sometimes can be very important.

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