[WB] No Trespassing! 7 Ways to Re-Build Your Boundaries

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Feature ArticleNo Trespassing! 7 Ways to Re-build Your Boundaries

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September 30, 2010

Volume 1, Issue 1

Published every Thursday.

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I’m really excited to be launching this, the first ever edition of WorkBrilliant, my new weekly eZine.

Here’s a few questions to ponder on…

Do you often feel that your life is out of control and you’re just

Do you look at your days off work as time to recover from the
pressures of the week?

Is it hard to find time for yourself and those important relationships
in your life?

Would you like to create some space to do the things that are
important to you?

Today’s modern living comes at a price. Our personal time is often held as a hostage because we haven’t got enough time to get everything done during the working week. Busy-ness  haemorrhages into our evenings, weekends and holidays. It’s socially acceptable to work an extended working week to the detriment of the quality and quantity of our personal life. Busy people are often at the mercy of information overload, chaos, overwhelm and ultimately burn out. The lines between work time and personal time have become blurred and we’re all just running around in the chaos trying to get things done.

We have lots of roles to balance and there’s never enough time. We try to make the best of a bad situation settling and surviving because time is so scarce and it’s just impossible to get everything done.

Every Thursday this eZine will give you some quick practical tips and resources to help you become more productive and take a healthier approach to your work life and your personal life. You get to lead a happier and healthier life!

Look out for WorkBrilliant™ in your inbox and take a few moments out from the chaos and begin to change your life.

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and to get clear what was important to me.”

“I was sat in a bar one evening with a girlfriend and suddenly looking across the table at her face. I realised I had not stopped ranting for the past 1/2 hour on how frustrating I was finding everything both at home and work. Bless my girlfriend for listening but also for suggesting Elaine to help me get through the frustrations.

I decided on the Unlocking Your Pure Potential programme and from the 1st week was amazed at how true and relevant the notes from Elaine were. I had just turned 40 and realised that all the plans I had set in my late 20’s were just not going to happen. It was time to set some new ones but I hadn’t a clue where to start. The program really helped me to clear out the clutter in the brain and to get clear what was important to me. The added bonus was being able to let things go that I had worried about for ages. I managed to stay focused on some short term goals and although I still haven’t mapped out the next 10 years, I am not worried about this and just enjoying exploring the different options now open to me. The narrowed goggles are gone and the choices are endless. I look forward now to journey and being able to explore.”

Sarah Mee, London

Join me for a coaching experience that will absolutely change your life. Guaranteed!

This programme provides you with a foundation blueprint to create changes in your life and move from chaos into conscious creative living:  Living On Purpose. It’s a 7-week coaching programme, where you get to work at your own pace. Step by step I will show you how to get clear on what’s important to you, help you to step into your power and take some real action to make the changes you want to make in your life.

You also receive 3 one on one private coaching sessions with me so you can get further faster!

I’m offering Special WorkBrillianteZine launch pricing only to my subscribers of £297. The full price of this programme is usually £497.

I can only offer this for seven days as spaces are limited. The offer closes at midnight on 7 October, 2010 or sooner if all the spaces go quickly!

Click on the Unlocking Your Life’s Potential banner above to find out more!

No Trespassing! 7 Ways to Re-build Your Boundaries

“I have so much to do and everyone wants my time – my boss, co-workers and parents! I don’t have any personal time. Work days are long and often extend into the evenings and weekends. I have good intentions to play with the kids and spend time with my wife, but these often get neglected. I’m working at home in my personal time just trying to keep up!”

James, a Coaching Client


Have you ever felt like this?

I started my career working in a retail bank in the north of England. It was in the days when there was one computer in a branch – it was huge! ‘Newbies’ weren’t allowed to touch the ‘machine’ (as we called it) until they’d worked in the branch for at least 6 months! The first time I used it, I was terrified!

Each day we’d get an internal mail bag containing memos and reports that needed to be worked on. It would be distributed around the office. We instantly knew our workload. This was our ‘inbox’ for the day.

Looking back – work was predictable to manage (though it felt hard at the time!).

Fast-forward to 2010…

Today we are living in what is called the Information Age. Advances in technology has created a world where we have 24/7 connect-ability and information overload. While this is a positive thing, it’s hard to keep up with all the demands that are placed upon us.

Work time haemorrhages into our personal time as we find ourselves at the mercy of other people’s urgent and unpredictable demands, expectations and agendas.

It’s like getting one of those internal post bags every few minutes!

We react by sacrificing our personal time (evenings, weekends and holidays) in the hope that we can keep up with all the demands. We teach others that it’s okay to trespass on our personal time. They climb our fences, erode our boundaries and walk right across our land!

Here’s six ways to repair your boundaries to stop allowing other people’s demands trespassing on your personal time:

1.    Start with Intention – If you know that things aren’t working, answer the following questions: What do I want? What don’t I want? This is a great place to start. Think about your working time and your personal time. Get clear on what YOU want.

2.    Be Selective – The rising tide of information and requests aren’t going to stop. You have to learn how to be selective. Get in tune with your intention and values. Focus on your high value brilliant work. Low value stuff can be 1) automated, 2) delegated, or 3) deleted. This could be at work and at home!

3.    Re-define Your Boundaries – Make a clear distinction between your working time and personal time. Plan in advance how long you intend to work each day. Sometimes the unexpected happens, but if you don’t know when you intend to finish work, it is easier just to carry on. Plan a week ahead what you intend to do. Schedule dates and times for important activities in your planner, e.g. Wednesday – leave work at 6pm. Or Thursday 6.30 -7.15am Go to the gym.

4.    Begin Your Day Email Free – If your job isn’t email-based leave your computer off for the first hour each day and do something more important! Check your emails at set times during the day, e.g. 10.30am, 12.30pm, and 4.30pm.

5.    DisciplineShow up, Switch on, Stop! This will prevent work time haemorrhaging into your personal time. Using a timer set for 60 minutes can help you start and stop activities, so you can make progress and then move on to the next task. It stops you getting distracted and keeps you focused. Try it!

6.    Dis-connect – If you’ve become addicted to your devices it’s hard to be fully present for anything else because you are always checking in with your technology. Switch-off your technology and be 100% present for your friends, family and for YOU.

7.    Learn to Say No – Be realistic about what you are able to achieve. Sometimes we say ‘Yes’ when we should be saying ‘no’ because we already have so much work to do and we’re frightened to let other people down. “Give me more to do. Look I can do it all!” So your employers, families and friends increase their demands upon you.

Who’s trespassing on your personal time?

Elaine is the president and founder of Elaine Bailey International Ltd, a company solely devoted to coaching successful women and men into their best lives. She mentors busy corporate people to move away from the chaos and overwhelm of settling and surviving by offering them a whole new approach to productivity, business and lifestyle. Her clients range from nurses, vets, lawyers, bankers, entrepreneurs, senior executives to creatives, who are ready to take the leading role in their life.

Through her workshops, courses, coaching programmes, and products, Elaine shows her clients how to experience freedom and how to take the control back in a busy life. She shares an inside and out approach to create ultimate abundance and happiness.

Elaine is also an international business coach and Head of Coaching for a highly respected learning and development consultancy business in the UK. She works at senior level in large organisations. She is also an international motivational speaker, whose topics include “Are You in Business or Busy-ness? Four Ways to Get Your Life Back on Purpose.”

If you liked todays issue, you will love Elaine’s high-content coaching programme Unlocking Your Life’s Potential to stop settling and surviving and start creating and thriving in your life. You don’t have to feel crazed or pressured by the pace of modern life. Now is the time to step into your power and live your life on purpose!

Elaine Bailey International Ltd. Registered Office: PO Box 250; Meltham; Holmfirth;

United Kingdom  HD9 9BL; Registered No: 7015168; info@elainebaileyinternational.com

©2010 by Elaine Bailey International Ltd
(Registered Address: PO Box 250 88 Pavilion Way Meltham Holmfirth HD9 9BL; No: 7015168).
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